Friday, March 2, 2012

Incident in the kitchen

Something disgusting happened to me today. I am still a little shaken up, but because writing can be therapeutic,  I've decided to share.

It all started when I naively entered the kitchen to empty the dishwasher and grab a snack. Putting away the dishes went pretty smoothly except for a little incident involving cascading tupperware. I am just not a tupperware organizer though, so I shoved it all back in its place and moved on. I was not sure what I wanted in the snack department so I went looking through the fridge. It's rainy and getting pretty chilly here so I decided to have something at room temperature instead. I shut the fridge and went back over to the cabinets to rummage for something. I pushed and pulled a few things around and brought out a sleeve of crackers.

That's when I felt it.

It was a little tickle on my arm, and at first I thought the band on my watch had come loose. I twisted my wrist and it felt different than my watch band normally does when it comes loose. Something moved.

I froze. Then I dropped the crackers, reached down, pulled up my sleeve and out came...
A ROACH!! FROM INSIDE MY SHIRT!!!!!

I have NO idea how it got in my sleeve but I screamed. And I ran. And then I realized that Chris is in Richmond until late tonight and this thing isn't going to kill itself (though that didn't stop me from praying that it would, in fact, kill itself so I wouldn't have to).

Now the last thing I wanted was to (a) leave it unguarded so it somehow escapes in the house only for me to find it later or (b) hear/feel its crunch when I killed it. So I hustled back into the kitchen, grabbed a giant frying pan on the fly (as well as my camera), took this very blurry picture and then screamed again when I slammed the frying pan down on the counter (so that I wouldn't have to hear and crunch, and also because my adrenaline was obviously overflowing at this point).

I killed it. It was big. It was disgusting and gross. It was very frightening to find a bug of massive proportions inside the sleeve of my shirt. Gross. The end.

8 comments:

Erika said...

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww! I have definitely heard my fair share of "crunches" when killing roaches at the John. Never found one inside my shirt though...yuck.

LA-jan said...

My heart goes out to you! Your mom and I had the most disgusting rental full of those things. Really gross to live with that! Never found one on me though! Eeww :((

Patty said...

Oh my gosh, that thing is HUGE! I can't believe you had nerves of steele to grab your camera! Inside your shirt?? Oh my gosh...I hope yu slept well!

jennie said...

oh wow i didn't realize it was inside your shirt. that is TERRIFYING

Aunt Michele said...

I came home from work one morning and found one on the collar of my uniform shirt! It was gross... but better on your shirt then in the cabinets of your home! I know it came from the hospital!!!

maggie said...

this post will now give me nightmares! i didn't realize when you told me "i found a roach" that you meant "i had a roach in my sleeve!"

Ashley said...

Hahaha I know I'm totally late in commenting on this post - this is disgusting and hilarious all at the same time!

Dorothy said...

Yikes!!!! That get the blood pumping! At least you KNOW you killed it.